| March 14, 2014

Here's what we've got for you today:

A friend of the Kardashian sisters pushed a pants-less Kourtney Kardashian out onto the balcony of the Versace mansion in Miami, where the paparazzi immediately began snapping pictures. This "friend" also happens to be in the PR business, so we're already skeptical that this was just a prank.

READ: Khloe Kardashian Goes Topless in First Vine Video

Scarlett Johansson bared a ton of cleavage in a lacy outift at the "Captain America: The Winter Soldier" premiere. (On another note, does anybody else think it's unfair that she's one of the only Avengers without her own movie?)

PHOTOS: One Hot Mama: Scarlett Johansson’s Sexiest Red Carpet Looks

A horrible person is auctioning off some debris and sunglasses he found at the Paul Walker crash site. So if you're a horrible person too, you can go bid on those at

Ashton Kutcher took Mila Kunis on a double date with his "Two and a Half Men" co-star Jon Cryer this Wednesday, presumably after Cryer kept asking Kutcher why they never hang outside of work.

READ: 10 TV Characters Who Were Famously Killed Off

A performance artist vomited all over Lady Gaga during her South by Southwest concert, because after she's worn a meat suit and hatched from an egg during her stage show, Gaga has kind of backed herself into a corner. Watch at your own discretion:

PHOTOS: Lady Gaga's Craziest Couture

Kate Moss' little sister Lottie, 16, has made her modeling debut in Teen Vogue. We give it a few years before Johnny Depp comes a-callin'.

PHOTOS: When Kate Moss And Johnny Depp Parted And Other Celeb Breakups

Britney Spears was photographed wearing a sauna suit in Calabasas, Calif., in an effort to boost her workout through "super profuse sweating."

PHOTOS: Britney Spears' Stage Spectacles

Helena Bonham Carter tried for a reggae-inspired look (complete with dreadlocks) while hosting a reggae-themed fundraiser in London, but the Daily Mail accurately thought that she looked more like Boy George.

Taylor Swift recently hang out with Ina Garten of Food Network's "Barefoot Contessa" for a day of cooking, mutual admiration and Instagram selfies.

PHOTOS: Celebrities Caught Taking Selfies

In an attempt to humanize their client, Taylor Swift's people tried to make her look funny and self-deprecating in this "For Your Consideration" video for the upcoming ACM Awards:

WATCH: Taylor Swift Tries Her Hand at Comedy on Instagram

Hasbro is letting fans choose the newest word to be added to the official Scrabble dictionary. We nominate "quone."

In Rob Lowe's second memoir "Love Life," he basically recounts the time he tried to get into Madonna's pants, but ultimately blew his chance when he declined to dance.

READ: Lindsay Lohan Allegedly Made a List of All Her Hollywood ‘Hookups’

Vanity Fair did a photoshoot with Jen Selter, the woman with "the most talked-about bum on Instagram." Who's doing this talking, you ask? Hard to say, but we suspect a healthy portion of the discourse is conducted by pubescent teenage boys.

Kate Middleton will reportedly have full access to the queen's private jewelry collection when packing for her trip to New Zealand and Australia. BUT THERE SHALL BE NO WEARING OF THE ROYAL TIARAS, a source claimed. 

READ: Were William and Kate Snubbed by the Maori King of New Zealand?

After urging fast food employees to name the items you should never order, Reddit has now asked waiters and waitresses to name the worst things that patrons have ever done.

READ: Fast Food Employees Name The Items You Should Never Order

And finally, the mothers of Jonah Hill, Adam Levine, Alicia Keys and Jennifer Lopez have teamed up — Avengers-style — to bring us this super-powered PSA: