What a Man's Relationship With His Mother Says About Him
It doesn't matter whether he loves men or women — a man's relationship with his mother will create serious lines and crevices into his personality. It's the first person he had a close and connected relationship with (in most cases) and is, in many circumstances, the person who shaped his values and outlook on the world.
When you meet a man, take heed of what sort of relationship he has with his mom. It's going to reveal quite a bit about who he is as a person or, at the very least, how he relates to his romantic partners.
#1. He avoids his mother altogether.
Does he spend a good deal of time avoiding his mother, and not because he's a forgetful man but because she creates anxiety or distress for him? He can't put her in her place if she upsets him; he's a people-pleaser and not very confident. Also, he's afraid if he tells her how he really feels, he will either upset her or get more flack from her.
He is known as a "nice guy" and liked by others, but he floats underneath the surface, meaning he doesn't really engage hardcore in social activities or the community. If you are an outgoing type of partner, you won't thrive with this man. If you like operating under the radar, this dude is the one for you.
He can be a little passive-aggressive but he is not likely to leave you if he commits to you. Why? Commitment to him probably produces anxiety, so if he's decided to deal with the anxiety and stay with you, you're a keeper to him. It takes a lot for him to deal with problems head-on, so expect deep conversations and fights to be difficult.
#2. His mother dictates his life.
He can't do or say anything without "mommy's approval," even if he's 40. Dare I say it? Run! Yes, this is a man who will dote on you and spoil you. Yes, this is a man who believes that women are important and valued. All positives, no? Of course they are. The problem is, there can only be one Queen Bee in his world, and that, my dear, is not you. It's her.
This means that any major decision he makes will be predicated on what she wants, and not what you two want as a couple. He is a loving and affectionate guy who is everyone's best friend. No one has a bad word to say about him. He is generous in spirit and loyal as a puppy, but ultimately his view of you will always be shaped by that seen or unseen force: mommy dearest.
#3. He openly hates his mother.
This guy has a chip on his shoulder that's so big, it's amazing he can walk through the door. He's a hustler and a great businessman, but has the bite of a rattlesnake. Watch out!
He has a tumultuous relationship with his mother that is rooted from day one, and it's not pretty. Either she's a hot mess or somehow, at some point, she disappointed or let him down so badly that she can't get on the right foot with him. He holds a grudge at any and all costs, so involving yourself with him would essentially mean catering to his needs.
For all his temper, though, he has an appealing dramatism and emotional component that borders on charisma. He is a broken bad boy, and women love this and he loves women … to a point. He loves them when they're behaving as they should and not when they're behaving as they shouldn't. Chauvinist much? Oh yes.
The reality is he's afraid of the power a woman could have over him, so he has a ton of girlfriends and, somehow, none of them measure up. He is also prone to complaining about his mother and garnering sympathy for his broken childhood by doing so. If you're considering dating a type like this, here's what I have to offer: Don't do it!
#4. He's afraid of disappointing his mother.
He is close to his mom, but she doesn't dictate his life. Nope, instead, he has an intense fear that he will disappoint her and he tends to sneak around to do what he wants to do, especially if he thinks she won't give the thumbs up.
He tends to be a sneaky and crafty person, taking all kinds of risks and usually succeeding at them, but if you're involved with him, you'll have to get involved in his little escapades, which can get old quick. He wants to please you because he hates confrontation of any kind, but you can see him saying "yes" to you but then doing what he really wanted to do in the first place. It's a little annoying.
#5. He completely clings to his mother.
He is with her a lot, and while she doesn't call the shots, he is constantly touching base with her. So much so that guess what? She knows about all of her son's relationship squabbles! It's a bit of an incestuous relationship.
He has great respect for women and is eager to hear his partner's opinion, but he's also immature and not able to call the shots on his own. He is the first person to help anyone else out in the family, which is lovely, but he also tends to talk behind people's backs, complaining about his duty while at the same time feeling like he must be dutiful. He needs a strong woman in his life because he's a bit dependent on others.
#6. His mother is his best friend.
If he befriends his mother yet can speak out if she upsets him, you have a confident man on your hands. You have a man who is not threatened by women but stimulated by them. He enjoys romantic partnerships and loves the thrill of an argument, so if you are a bit passive or not confident, he will not be the one for you.
His mom probably knows more about his relationships than a romantic partner would like, but if mom doesn't like the person he loves, he's quick to tell her to back the F up, if need be. He's got a lot of women friends — which could be fodder for jealousy — and he isn't quick to commit, but when he does commit, he's pretty taken in with the love interest he has chosen.